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Sorry that I kind of suck. [Oct. 16th, 2003|12:17 am]

liviapenn
As Lex would probably say if he were in this situation... Thomas Mann once said, "A writer is someone for whom writing is harder than it is for other people."

If this is in fact true, then I am THE ULTIMATE WRITER. Because it seems like a complete and total impossibility for me to write even fucking word one these days. *sigh*

I wanted to polish up the completed draft of Manifest Destiny before it got jossed by canon, and I haven't done that, and now I'm all "Why bother?" which is crappy. And I said I'd write for several challenges and I haven't, and I feel crappy about that. And I know it's been fifteen weeks since Altville was updated, and believe me I feel *really* crappy about that.

It would almost be better-- in a totally selfish way, of course-- if I'd gotten distracted by something else shiny and just abandoned Altville to write something else, some other fandom, some other story, because at least then I'd be writing. But... no. I want to write the boys. I just got nothin'.

So, this is just to say, if you're one of the people I was going to write a challenge story for-- I haven't forgotten. And I'm sorry that I volunteered and then got stuck. And if you were one of the people who was reading Altville, and liked it-- I haven't forgotten it and I haven't purposely abandoned it, either. But I know that me saying that doesn't make the Alex/Julian porn magically appear, does it?

So, yes, massive self-pity happening here. [info]linabean suggested that I ask the fandom to write me porn to my specifications in return for Altville, but that would be so wrong... (tempting, but so wrong) and it probably wouldn't work anyway.

But, my main point is that I'm sorry about leaving people hanging. Especially if you were from the part of the audience that commented, because I always appreciated that. But even if you didn't comment, I'm still sorry I've been slacking. And I am trying to get back to it. I wrote a little bit a few days ago... I haven't gone back to look at it yet because I'm scared it'll look like everything else that comes out of my fingers these days, just dead and flat and *bad*. Ugh.

But I'm still trying. And I still love Alex and Julian. And I want to see Altville finished as much as anybody. (Well, except maybe [info]linabean.) *grins* So... this is just to reassure everyone, I guess. I'm going through a rough path, but I *mean* to finish the story. I will try.

Also, I should probably thank [info]svmadelyn and [info]kiezh as well as [info]linabean for not letting me forget about the story and always being around and willing to listen if I wanted to write in chat, which I can't seem to make myself do any more, but... thanks anyway, guys. It does mean something that you still haven't forgotten about the story.

And I guess that's about it.
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Altville, Part Thirty-Three [Jun. 28th, 2003|03:45 am]

liviapenn
The greatest parts, without discretion, may be fatal to their owner. Polyphemus, deprived of his eye, was only the more exposed on account of his enormous strength and stature. ~ David Hume

(  Altville, Part Thirty-Three  )
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Altville, Part Thirty-Two [Jun. 27th, 2003|03:11 am]

liviapenn
Come sail your ships around me
And burn your bridges down
We make a little history, darling
Every time you come around
~ Nick Cave, 'Ship Song'

(  Altville, Part Thirty-Two  )
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Altville, Part Thirty-One [Jun. 26th, 2003|01:53 am]

liviapenn
I couldn't get with the program
And I couldn't listen to them
It was like trying to think in reverse
And I don't want to slide into apathy
And I don't want to die in captivity
But these monsters follow me around
Hunting me down, trying to wipe me out
~ Something For Kate, 'Monsters'

(  Altville, Part Thirty-One  )
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Altville Interlude: Kissin'! Awwwwww [Jun. 24th, 2003|12:04 pm]

liviapenn
I know it's been forever since I updated, but, well. I said I'd update regularly, not that I'd kill myself over it. This past week has ben crazy, what with finals, me actually having a date ^_^;;; and also the new HP book coming out. But I haven't given up on Altville and we're almost to some bits that I really, really want to write, so hopefully that'll help me build up some momentum in the coming days.

Anyway, in the meantime, [info]chaosraven went and drew me a picture of the boys being all cute. :D We both think Alex looks a little young, but hey-- boys-- cuteness-- can't beat that. :D

(I still adore just about all her SV fanart. Look! x-ray face! And Angel!Clark! *happysigh*)
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